Addiction to a TV/ NETFLIX SERIES can SAVE YOUR LIFE!

My friend Serena just txted me to watch a new show about alcohol and drug addiction interventions. She's been looking for something to hook her since she completed all the madmen episodes.

my friend's friends

about half way through she was telling me how inspired she was by "those people." and how she had to get home from work to be with "her people" and "see how they were doing." This winter has sucked the serotonin right out of the best of us, and I don't actually know anyone in the northeast who hasn't succumb to some form of tv or netflix addiction. i consider the lucky ones to be those who have both a daily fix (say ellen) and a show of many seasons and episodes they can access at will.

This is what ellen would look
like if she were my normal friend
and we just each bought some manila envelopes

SOME are proud of their addictions, but many have a sort of sneaky-fun guilty pleasure thing about it, or downright fear and shame.










 i was surprised and pleased when watching

this makes me want to join them right now

orange is the new black  was charging me up like a drug. boom, finish one, punch in next episode. at first listen to the theme music because it added to the charge. then skip over. instant fix. then over. piper kerman, thanks for what you did for me.

i used to miss eating at the tibetan buddhist monastery--but this makes me feel even more homesick. more homesick than eating at grandma's house. my stomach hurts i want so much to be back at this table, eating the food red cooked for me.

but that was last year.

this year i've been a little jealous of my addicted pals, as i haven't formed a deep friendship with anyone not of the flesh--yet. Has anyone ever explored the idea that these friendships are important, and even life-sustaining? Only a decade ago, I used to think TV addictions were for kids (sat morn cartoons and ninja turtles) and for old people. I knew a few old people who would stop talking to you when you came to visit. put on their favorite show, and get more out of those people. Next thing you know, it's happening to all of us.

This is how amazing it seemed to
have louis c.k. appear in my living room
(livingroom??) thanks a lot forever!

Louis C.K. made my life worth living, back in 2010. If he had hourly episodes of his show, I would have mainlined them.

he does have this, and it's worth five bucks.

he was the one thing that came into the livingroom that was welcome, since i basically was housebound and isolated, and the only thing in that livingroom was my own body and brain and carton of ice cream. and painkillers. when louis arrived, some piece of me was ignited with hope. i am positive i would not have been more inspired and soothed if an actual angel perched at the edge of my couch. hence, in some kind of greek or roman logic, louis c.k. is my angel.


 I know that when I was 15 and living on my own in San Francisco, it was the belief that Robert Blake (of the detective show, Baretta)would pluck me off the streets and save me, was the fantasy that kept me alive for a while. (in retrospect, it's probably a good thing he did not do that.) I know that when i had a jobette episode in life, (hurricane, deaths, broken limbs, lyme, homeless and SHELLSHOCKED)--i marathoned on episodes of America's Next Top Model. I am sure I did not crack a smile,

this is not me at all

or settle down to watch with lifted and inspired heart--but the predictable format, the process of challenge, judging and elimination somehow soothed and reassured my brain when watched repeatedly. this is totally normal for americans. is anyone exempt. i think ellen--the madmen--louis c.k.--and all the friends in the friend-like shows, these people really ARE our friends. downton abbey, parenthood,  modern family

fans of this show will get excited to see this picture

or jersey housewives, or new girl, or even the golden girls or lucy and ethel.


it doesn't even matter if they're dead now.

sometimes it's BETTER when they're dead or
the show is over. forever. will never come back again with the same people at that age the way you loved them. a lot. (i didn't like this show, but it is an example, to illustrate how the macabre and joy can co-exist.)

i spent more time in mary tyler moore's living room than most of my childhood livingrooms.

 we are lucky to know them! when all is said and done, the characters in books

and movies and shows may not have been able to hug me or sit down to dinner with me (although i often eat while spending time with THEM)---but they have been as comforting, inspiring and entertaining at times as the flesh friends. why not, if not done to the exclusion of the whole world? if i am honest about when i feel most connected with my family,

needs no caption

it is first at meals or the rare times we might pray together, then walking or hiking together, or on the beach, and the one time we biked together in martha's vineyard, that was so fun, we should do it again--or playing some sort of game--whether board game or miniature golf--(we've done each of those once in the past ten years)--holidays, of course-- (last christmas, with two new grandsons, opening presents in mass., and then going to mass in fla. was pretty epic)--driving in cars, one on one talking (this happened more before college graduation)--and almost always when watching something funny on tv together while eating something good.  why would anyone feel guilty about this--and if it's good enough for family it's good! btw the hotlink to "We biked together" is not about me. but it could be someday!